by Lois Barth, Human Development Expert, Leadership and Motivational Speaker, Executive Coach, and Author

One thing I hate feeling more than anything is helpless. It cuts me to my knees. The only thing I dislike even more is someone else, throwing their hands up in the air, and rendering themselves helpless. While it’s been a very scary two weeks that feels more like a year, the more silent we become the more complicit we are. It is our silence not our outrage that helps to contribute to the cancer of apathy in our society.

And yes it scares me every time I take an action to be positively visible, and yes, now more than ever, each of us must do one thing, even small bite-sized actions that stretch not necessarily break us in service of the world we want to create, and protect the freedoms that are crumbling by the nanosecond.

On Saturday night, I was going to go out to dinner at a restaurant in Bklyn that was vandalized with propaganda and hate-filled language the month before. I called them to make sure they’re okay, and business is going well. They were very touched by my concern and said they received so many calls and social media shoutouts supporting them. This reminds me what I know is true; that love and compassion are far more powerful than hate and division. Hatred caves in on itself; light comes to the surface. That’s my LOIS-ism.

So when I heard there was a local business that was actually doing a “teach-in” if you can believe that, to show people how to organize an intifada, I was outraged. Outraged that the disease of hatred, especially targeted towards the Jewish people as well as the US and Western cultures, like a cancer given full reign to metastasize through our society would be allowed to fly. And as Rachel Maddow says, “Fascism starts with the Jews, but it doesn’t end with them.”

I became incensed. I called my sweetheart Marty and asked if we could cancel plans and go to the rally instead. He said, “Of course, I totally support you 100%.

I won’t lie. I was scared. I’m someone who writes letters, does phone banking, signs petitions, donates, shares me truth, and educates whenever I can, but public outings are not my thing.

It was cold and rainy, and was going to snow. I had a grey cloud over me all day. An organized event to support ignorance and hatred was impacting my plans and confronting me in worrisome ways. I breathed through it, meditated, EFT, oy, the works, and showed up anyway.

Bless the NYPD. They were a definite presence. I went up to every officer on the squad and thanked them personally. They were palpably appreciative. There were many more in solidarity than those in defiance and promoting hatred and violence as a means to express their point of view.

A moment came where a very visible person in our community came forward and said, “We need to come together and need our voices heard. I knew I needed to speak, and magically, passion and courage took the place of fear and worry. Ironically I speak professionally, but speaking in this group felt very different.
From my soul, my truth poured out of me with passion and fire and a feeling of connection with my kindred spirits. I was exhilarated afterward.

I heard in a recent workshop I took that confidence is knowing the truth. For me in knowing the truth, I felt a presence, a confidence to speak it. What I learned is that trauma and fear often tell us this scary story with gloom and doom that rocks our very DNA. But if we’re willing to move forward, take that step forward, with experience a different picture.

One where courage replaces fear, and faith replaces trauma. Something profound opened up for me this past Saturday night, and I’m not going back. We can’t go back, we must go forward.

And if you’re of the majority who is deeply concerned about the state of the world, especially in your home terrain, you MUST do something. It doesn’t need to be what others are doing.

Some of my colleagues are dedicated their full-time to pursuing the truth, and piecing together any semblance of democracy we still have; and while I have unending admiration for them, that’s not my path.

But if we all do something, things can and will change. And if you’re doing nothing, then please know you’re being complicit, and that’s not okay. I’m not shaming or criticizing you, I’m simply saying what is.

Do something!

As for me, I’m reminded that fear and anxiety are tricksters, they often tell me lies to keep me in their version of being safe, which is an illusion. But when we peel away those layers and challenge and question them, then we are more apt to take action, and in the action is our freedom, and in freedom is the direction of change.

Step Up. Step Out. Don’t Step Back!

How will you be stepping out, stepping back in areas that you feel strongly about that move the needle of positive change forward?

I’d love to know.