Photos courtesy of Jared Rice, Casey Lee, and Nathan Dumlao

by Lois Barth, Human Development Expert, Speaker, Coach, and Author

I’ll never forget when I heard that term. I was in my first coaching training over 15 years ago, which was led by a husband-and-wife team, who were and still are luminaries in both environmental sustainability and the coaching field.

“Commitment to vision flexible with form” that phrase reverberated through my being, and umpteen years later I’ve used it as a guiding principle with my clients, groups I’ve spoken to, and in both my personal and professional life.

But who would guess it would’ve been the theme of this year’s Super Bowl this year with my sweetheart Marty and me?

You see I know nothing about sports, and it’s one of the few subjects I have little to no interest in. Years back in a different profession I was offered a chance to have a one-time session working with Roger Clemens, but I needed to be on q.t. to which I asked, “Who’s Roger Clemens, a jazz musician?” to which they responded, “You’ll be perfect.” I was totally serious.

So, when I met Marty and things became serious, and learned about his passion for sports I thought ‘Oh no, the men I’ve had serious relationships with were guys who at parties would prefer to hang with women in the kitchen versus men in the living room.’ Yikes, how am I going to shorten this learning curve?

 My deer caught in the headlights look was beyond obvious when Marty asked me if I wanted to go to Citi Field to check out his favorite baseball team.

Fast forward to last year’s Superbowl game, “Honey want to watch the game with me,” Marty asked. “Sure,” I responded feigning interest. I need to turn this bus around. So typical of me, I decided to turn it into a personal growth opportunity, to learn as much about the game, less theory, and more overall themes. I asked questions, I was honestly interested. Marty, well-meaning but by half-time, somewhat weary, smiled weakly and said, “Sweetie, just watch, no need to act interested.” I was crestfallen.

This year, I’m going to do it differently than last year I promised. What does Marty love as much as sports?

Food, and especially being cooked for. When Superbowl came around, I cracked out my favorite healthy cookbook with fabulous recipes. A frightening and fun fact that won’t get you on Jeopardy is that the average American consumes 8,032 calories on Superbowl Sunday. Marty’s not going to be another caloric statistic on my dime.

“Sweetie, instead of actually watching the game with you, how about I make us a Superb Superbowl Supper with all new dishes that we’ve never had before, and I’ll set up a tray so you can watch it during the game. And when your team scores I’ll cheer them on! “Ah yeah! Sounds great,” Marty responded. Touchdown!

Fast forward two hours and a modicum of clanking pots later, we sat down by the TV during half-time to dine. Marty’s wicker tray complete with a napkin (fabric I might add) folded into a ring. Chowing down we both contemplated whether Rihanna has put on weight or is it just the TV adding 10 lbs., especially in baggy fluorescent pink. “Wow, best Super Bowl yet! Can we do this every Super Bowl Sunday?”

“You bettya,” I smiled, and we both won!

So why am I telling you about my dinner with Marty on Superbowl Sunday? I’m telling you because while it’s essential to commit to our vision, in my case, being supportive and interested in what’s important to Marty, yet flexible with the many ways it can be expressed.

As a motivational, resiliency, and mindfulness speaker in NYC,  and a life coach it’s so important to clarify a team or organizations vision while being flexible about the myriad of ways that vision can show up, and of course utilizing the individual team members unique talents, gifts, and interests.

Looking for ways to engage your team in a more unified cohesive way, or an upcoming event where you want your group to come away motivated, inspired, with clear next steps. Let’s set up a Discovery Call 

Hey, thanks for tuning in and not tuning out, what the world needs are people who are tuned in and not tuned out!