By Lois Barth, Human Development Expert, Speaker, Coach, and Author

I call myself a hopeless optimist and a hopeful romantic. They are playful dance partners that even when they step on each other’s toes, they can laugh it off and course correct. This is not the same as being in deep denial of the challenges of life these days or slapping a happy band-aid on a gaping wound and then bellyaching when things don’t change. It’s living life with eyes wide open and a bias towards optimism and what’s possible! 

Today I stumbled upon Winston Churchill’s famous quote which nailed it: 

“The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees opportunity in every difficulty.” – Winston Churchill 

To me, it’s about looking at life through a very intentional bias toward forwarding movement and thinking. 

I’m a motivational speaker in NYC, who is brought in to support groups and teams to experience less stress and become more resilient, mindful, and productive. So, if I can’t bring optimism, humor, or hope to the party with real tangible takeaways, I ain’t doing my job.  

So how do we do this in these times of stress, uncertainty, and division in this country?  

My 4C methodology starts with Curiosity, it’s my favorite one! Don’t tell the others, they may get jealous. We know he temperamental our creative children can be! 

Curiosity is to the mind what yoga is to the body, it makes us more flexible, balanced, and stronger.

Curiosity makes us agile not fragile. 

Here’s a 3-step method I do with my groups to help them cultivate curiosity especially when life doesn’t go our way and things stress us out. 

Use your past to inform to inspire your future.

Think of something in your past that at the time was a setback but ended up being a great gift. One colleague of mine disagreed with her landlord and she was asked to leave her apartment 6 months early amid winter. She was angry, frustrated, and stressed out. She tried desperately to patch things up but to no avail. So, she surrendered and looked around and to her shock and delight she found that winter inventory was high, and demand was low. She ended up finding a bigger, better, nicer, new place for less money and could start afresh. We laughed as she said she was so relieved to move on, that she “almost” wanted to send them a thank you card for kicking her out. I took her through the curiosity technique that I take my groups through. 

1)   L: What was the lesson she learned?

That was easy for her. Don’t paint a negative story or narrative when something happens, because the truth is you never know. Her lesson was to start fresh and be open to thinking some better outcome is possible.

2)   O: Opportunity for Growth?

Looking back, she now sees the opportunity to start fresh, to get clear what type of living situation she wanted, and a chance to get rid of so much stuff she was drowning in.

3)   N: Next Steps?

Clear and simple. What other options are out there? Before building a negative story with a gloom and doom ending, see the reality. Act and put yourself out there. 

This is not to diminish the terrible losses that people have and continue to go through, but curiosity is a great tool, to move toward forward thinking and action. To make changes, to let go of the old disempowering narrative, and to create a new one. 

Move from Criticism to Curiosity and you’ll find your optimism and your optimism will find you. 

How can cultivating a spirit of curiosity make a difference in your life right now? I’d love to know. 

Thanks for tuning in and not tuning out. 

Looking to make some important changes in your life?

Looking to shift your group’s mindset and have a methodology for greater engagement and morale? Let’s Tawk!  

Lois Barth is a Human Development Expert, Speaker, Coach, and Author, who works with heart-centered go-getters who crave greater meaning, impact, and fulfillment in their lives. www.loisbarth.com